Satire

In Order To Avoid Further Paper Leakage, JKSSB To Procure 200 Metric Tons Of M-Seal

M-Seal: Market leader in epoxy sealants in India

Umran Hussain

In a significant decision, the Jammu and Kashmir SSB has decided to procure more than 200 metric tons of M-Seal in order to avoid further paper leakage.

Talking to The Kashmir Radar, one of the top official who heads the “career ruining” wing
of the board said that plugging the leakage was in pipeline since 2016, but due to lack of commitment and availability of too much money, the board was not able to buy the product.

“Primarily we have earmarked two locations where most of the leakage has taken place, that is Jalandar and Akhnoor. Once those two locations are sealed, we will get an idea of other locations as well.” Said the official.

Asked about the buyer – seller meet in Akhnoor library, the official clarified (while swearing on his father) that the meeting between buyers and sellers was not about anything else but the required M- Seal for the board.

When asked about the “fixation of rates” the official said that it depends on the (FAI)  ‘Father’s Annual Income’ of the candidate and his (SKv) Secret Keeping value.

People with (SK) less than 2 are usually not invited in the Buyer-Seller meeting, said the official.

“I am sick and tired of this leakage now, it hurts, not because of the people who don’t avail its benefits, but because of the first time investors, the problem is that they never come back again. Losing ‘shares’ for stupid reasons hurts too much you know.” Said an elderly official apparently in his mid eighties.

 

DISCLAIMER:

The content in this piece is purely fictional and intended to be humorous, satirical. Readers are advised not to confuse them with real incidents.  resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as satire, parody or spoof of such persons and is not intended to communicate any true or factual information about that person.

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